People my age shouldn’t still be afraid of the dark. I mean come on; I’m 21 years old. But still every night I am sure there are lights on all over my apartment. As I walk to my room there is never a second that it is completely dark. As I make my way to my room I turn off lights. I always try not to look back but some force also jerks my head in that direction. When I am finally in my room I close the door and sit on my bed. When I finally get up the courage to turn the light off I stand at the switch and wait until I can wait no longer. As I flip the switch off I practically fly to my bed in a second. This split second seems to take an agonizingly long time. As I lay there my mind skims over all the horror flicks I’ve seen. The Ring comes to mind. I see a once cute, lost little girl coming out of my TV ready to kill me. I think of The Grudge and hear an odd sound and suddenly I am pulling the hair from my own head out of my face. Afraid that this hair isn’t really mine. By now my heart is beating so loud I begin to wonder if it is really only my heart beating. After I am finally as calm as I will get I put the pillow over my head and pull the covers up to my chin. This ensures that nobody will see me. Every bump is a footstep, every creek the sound of a window or door being open inch by agonizing inch. When I close my eyes I see hands creeping up the side of my bed grabbing for a human to pull under. I see rapist waiting until I least expect it to jump out of my closet. When I finally fall asleep I always wake up in a cold sweat. I am always thankful I do not remember my dreams. As hard as it is to admit my greatest fear I know deep down that nothing really will ever happen to me.
“Hey Izzi!” I hear the familiar sound of my friend Sophie’s voice. “Guess what!” she says as she falls into step with me. I see a glisten of sweat on her hairline and a glimmer in her eyes.
“Hmmmmmm. Let’s see.” I tap my chin. “I give up, what?”
“Well I won’t be in our dorm tonight! I am going to see the best concert ever tonight with Jay! I don’t want to wake you so he said I can just come over to his place afterwards.”
“Wow. Cool” I manage to choke out. The only coherent thoughts running through my head are how horrible tonight is going to be. I am going to be alone in our apartment. All Night. I speed away mumbling something about running late.
I see my target run by me and see a single tear slide down her cheek. Now I know that tonight is the night. Tonight I get my revenge. This girl shows me up at everything, she is smart, funny, and she is shy. Through all this her beauty shows through. We have been friendly competitors for years; she’ll never know what hit her. I asked her for a date, and she laughed at me. No, nobody can do that. Not to me at least. She’ll be sorry, she’ll pay.
I don’t rush to get home after my final class of the day. I walk up to the door, number 13. I never noticed before but our apartment is unlucky. As I step inside I feel a vibrating in my Abercrombie jeans pocket. I pull out my cell and flip it open. I see Sophia’s picture.
“Hello.” I say.
“Hey, my hands are full, do you think you could leave the door unlocked? I’ll be there in like fifteen minutes!” I hear a car horn honk and hear a quiet curse that Sophie mutters.
“I don’t mind, well I’ll be in the bath so I’ll see you in like half an hour.” I tell her knowing full well that I will fall asleep in the tub.
“Ok. Thanks!” She really does sound grateful.
“Bye.” I tell her as I push the end button probably chopping off her goodbye. I start the water in the bathtub and poor in a generous amount of bubbles. I already know tonight is going to be a very tense night for me. I set a timer for half and hour. I undress when the water is almost spilling over and the slide under the water. I am completely relaxed and my entire body is immersed in warm water and bubbles. I felt my mind drift and soon I fall asleep. I wake up to the ear splitting ringing of my timer. I pull my arm out of the water. I see little droplets of water drip off my arm and notice that my fingers are all pruned. I turn off the annoying timer and pull the plug at the bottom of the bathtub. After the amount of water in the tub decreased so much I am practically just sitting in bubbles I stand up. I grab my towel of the towel bar. I pat myself dry and then wrap the towel around my hair. Then I wrap up in a big warm bathrobe. When I open the bathroom door a lot of steam hits me and I am thankful I slipped my fuzzy slippers on before stepping onto the cold ceramic tile in the hallway. I peek into Sophie’s bathroom and see her preparing for her date.
“Hey Soph!” I smile at her.
“Hey!” She says as she clamps her eyelash curler on her long eyelashes.
“Are you almost ready?” I ask amazed by how much work she is putting into this for a hot sweaty concert.
“Yeah, I just have to finish my hair.” We both laugh. I think about how she has always said how ugly she is. She is the most beautiful girl I know. Guys are practically crawling all over her. She has an amazing personality too! I on the other hand am stick skinny. My hair is plain Jane brown and straight as bone. I am naturally shy and I am not much of a party girl.
“Well I’m sure you’ll look great.” I tell her with the honesty showing through in my voice.
“Thanks.” She smiles. I go to sit down on the couch and suddenly an anxiety fills me. Not even my best friend knows about my fear. I click the power button on the TV and get a movie ready. I go to my room and put on fleece pajamas before plopping back down on the couch. I have a bag of pre-made popcorn and a box of Sour Patch Kids. I press play and Zoolander comes on. Twenty minutes later Sophie’s bathroom door opens. She steps out with a scent of Sweet Pea perfume surrounding her.
“Wow, you look great!” I tell her. Her face breaks into a smile at the compliment. She has on low-rider jeans, a tight pink shirt, a bunch of plastic rainbow bracelets, and her hair is wavy. The hott pink stripes look amazing running through her thick black hair.
“Thank you.” She smiles even wider.
“You are going to have loads of fun.”
“You’re so right!” she claps her hands together and goes all dreamy on me. We hear a knock on the door, and she shoots for it. She lets Jay in.
“Hey.” He smiles down at her as he wraps his arms around her. He hugs her and then hooks his thumbs in her back pockets.
“Have fun you two.” I certainly didn’t need to see anymore of this.
“Ok, see ya!” The two left the apartment and I stayed on the couch. I finished Zoolander, and then I watched the Wedding Planner. Finally I look at the clock and it is midnight. I get up and grab a glass of water. Then I begin my evening ritual. I turn on and off lights all the way to my room managing to look back into the abyss of darkness behind me only two times. I get to my room and pulled the sheets down. I flipped my pillow over and went to the light switch. I was completely poised to jump into bed as I flipped the switch. My heart thumping in my ears and I scramble under the covers. I get all the hair out of my face and my pillow is secured tightly over my head. Then my mind begins its regular tricks. Is that footsteps? Nah. Was my door really open? This is crazy. Do I hear breathing? Just me. Was that the squeaky board by my bed? Couldn’t be. I push all the crazy thoughts into the most remote corner of my brain. I feel relieved, and then I hear it. The sound of something I’ve only had horrible thoughts about. The sound of a gun being loaded. I open my left eye slightly to push this thought away. Instead I see the shiny silver barrel of a revolver pointed directly at my head. This is crazy! Is my last thought as I hear the trigger being pulled and released. I barely feel the bullet hit me--